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As the centrepiece to your wedding day celebrations, contributing towards the overall theme and atmosphere, the reception venue and décor need to be chosen with care....
Location, location, location Firstly, you need to decide what you want in a venue. A venue may suit your chosen theme and your idealised vision of a perfect wedding location, but is it practical? Ask yourself the following questions: • Does the venue have the capacity to cater for all your guests? • Does it suit your budget and the type of reception you are planning, perhaps an informal breakfast or lavish evening affair? • Are you happy with the catering and menu options? • Is there enough space and adequate facilities for a DJ or live band? Think plug points and acoustics. • If the venue is out of town, are the roads good? Is the venue well sign-posted? If not, there could be transport problems and delays for both guests and service providers. • Additionally, if the venue is remote, is there adequate accommodation for guests who may wish to overnight? • If the venue is outdoors, is weather likely to be a problem? Think summer thundershowers in the Midlands and Drakensberg. • If necessary, will the venue be heated in winter and airconditioned in summer? • Are parking facilities sufficient and secure? • Will there be adequate toilet facilities for all your guests? • Finally, is the venue adequately insured? Remember that this is not your day alone, and resolve to take others (especially your parents if they are footing the bill!) into consideration. Be prepared to compromise. The best weddings strike a skilful balance between practical issues and romantic ideals. South Africa has some of the most awe-inspiring locations in the world, which are yours for the asking. In KwaZulu-Natal itself there are an outstanding variety of venues, all with different scenery and moods. If Africa is in your blood, you could opt for a thatched boma in a game reserve or colonial elegance on one of the north or south coast's sugar or golf estates. Alternatively, if you've always hankered after a country-style English wedding, then what could be better than the quaint countryside and romantic venues of the Midlands? In residence A reception at home tends to work particularly well in the case of small, informal weddings. Nevertheless, this type of wedding requires careful planning and a high degree of personal input, as every little detail is the responsibility of you and your helpers. Remember that home weddings are not necessarily the cheaper option as everything has to be hired and there may be many hidden costs. Caterers can be of great assistance if it is a fairly large wedding. Furthermore, you could consider the services of a professional function coordinator to take some of the work off your shoulders. If you do decide to "go it alone", then it's vital that you enlist extra domestic help, as well as allocating specific tasks to your friends and family. The great outdoors You and your partner may decide to hold your reception in an outdoor venue, such as a private beach, forest, mountain park, or even the garden of your own home. While this option takes a considerable amount of time, planning and coordination, particularly because you will need to hire items that would normally be provided at an established venue, the satisfaction of holding the reception in your dream setting may well be worth the extra effort! Be aware of the following points if holding your wedding outdoors: • You will need to hire a marquee in case it rains on the day. • A wide range of permits - from parking to alcohol consumption - are needed to host a function in a public place, and you must be aware of noise restrictions and curfews. • Insects may be a problem during summer; consider using citronella candles to keep them away. • Ensure there is sufficient guest parking onsite or at a nearby location; consider hiring a car guard for security. • The Marriage Act states that wedding ceremonies should take place in a church, public office or a private dwelling with open doors. To avoid any uncertainty about the validity of an outdoor marriage, conduct a civil service in a magistrate's court in addition to a ceremony at the venue of your choice. • Also, don't forget about toilet facilities - you may need to hire portable amenities for the occasion. Hired hall More formal than a home wedding or outdoor venue, a hired hall has the benefit of being able to accommodate a large number of people. Remember that there is a great deal of work involved in this choice of venue too, as a hall requires a lot more effort to decorate and personalise, and you will still have to hire a large proportion of what you need. Additional lighting is another detail that may have to be considered. Check whether there are any restrictions you should know about, such as no alcohol being allowed on the premises. You will need to book caterers, checking whether the kitchen facilities at the venue are sufficient for their needs. While church and community halls usually have adequate parking facilities, you may also want to hire extra security for the duration of the reception. Hotel, country club or restaurant Here your choice of venue is almost limitless, from intimate restaurants and informal garden settings to elaborate ballroom receptions. Established venues are able offer a comprehensive and professional wedding day service, and are a winning choice in that they are able to handle many aspects of the wedding planning, which takes some of the pressure off you! When choosing your venue, make sure it is large enough to cater to your needs yet still offers the attention to detail and personal touch that you require. Bear the following venue checklist in mind: • Popular venues book up months, or even a year, in advance, so make you booking early! • Whether you select your venues by word of mouth or personal preference, it's a good idea to see a photograph of the venue when laid out for another wedding reception. • Find out whether you will be sharing the venue with anyone else, and if this will be a problem. • Enquire about any special packages that may be available and get a detailed, written quote. • Ascertain what the venue will supply, such as a red carpet, podium and PA system, ample parking, cake knife, dance floor, and free use of barmen and waiters. • Are you happy with the menu? It should include vegetarian and kosher or Halaal options. • Is there a venue charge, or is this included in the menu price? • Also find out whether you will be able to bring in your own caterers and decorators, or if these are supplied. • The same goes for your liquor requirements. Must these be purchased from the venue or will you be able to source your own? Note that a deposit will most likely be required in order to secure your booking at the venue of your choice. It will simplify your wedding plans greatly if the venue organises flowers, DJs, etc, in-house. Some even help with the invitations, gifts for your attendants and getting visas if you're honeymooning abroad. Find out whether staff are able to receive deliveries, such as the flowers and cake, from service providers, and if the manager will be there on the day to iron out any possible glitches in proceedings. If your venue has a cr che it is a big plus for parents with young children! Also, remember that it helps to have the church and reception venues in close proximity so there are no huge delays. These days it's possible to get have the ceremony and reception at the same venue, as many have chapels or gazebos and provide a complete wedding service, from hiring the minister to supplying hairdressers and beauticians on the day. This simplifies travelling and time constraints for everyone involved, from the bridal party to guests. Décor dynamics The right décor at a reception venue can transform the ordinary into the extraordinary. Simple tools such as fabric, ribbon, mirrors, candles and flowers can create a fairytale setting, perfectly illustrating your theme for a dream wedding celebration. Find out how much input your chosen location allows in the decorating of the reception venue. While some venues, such as clubs and hotels, include décor as part of the total package, you may also be able to have personal input. Function managers of these venues are usually very experienced and can offer lots of helpful advice. If having the reception at home, in a hired hall or outdoor venue, it's likely that you will want to take creative control of the décor. Look for inspiration from fashion magazines and bridal fairs as well as specialist party shops and hiring companies. Let your imagination run wild on items such as draping, special lighting and additional flower arrangements. However, if stuck for ideas or in need of some practical advice, especially if it's going to be a very large, elaborate affair, consider enlisting the aid of a function coordinator to help you realise your vision. | Setting the stage Choosing the theme and colour scheme is usually the first step in your decorating plans. It's usual to extend the overall colour scheme of the wedding - which has probably already been applied to bridesmaids' dresses, flowers, etc - to the venue decorations as well. While table linen is traditionally white for weddings, a colour theme may be subtly introduced in napkins or overlays. Pastels shades are very current and could encompass floral arrangements and drapes as well as platters of gently glowing scented candles. Richly embossed fabrics in neutral shades are also popular. Themes to consider could range from classical, which calls for simple white drapes and table linen, stately candleholders, white roses and traditional almond bonbonieres, to a glitzy celebrity affair with gold draping, elaborate centrepieces and tables strewn with rose petals. An African or ethnic theme could make use of beaded napkin holders, Guinea Fowl feathers, indigenous flowers and animal print fabrics, while the medieval or baroque look would need wrought iron bowls, candelabra and radiant jewel shades. Other themes to consider could be from a particular historical period, say 1920's, Victorian or flower power. Think about hobbies and interests you and your groom have in common, perhaps mountain climbing, scubadiving, or even classical music! Deck the hall Consider a neutral colour scheme in your drapery and table linen. For example, cream and white accentuated with your chosen colour scheme and warm candlelight. Alternatively, you could go funky with flowers, ribbons, feathers and crepe paper decorations in a variety of different colours and designs, hanging from the ceiling as well as strewn across tables. The reception hall will look spectacular with crystal chandeliers, or even Chinese lanterns, and could also be decorated with fairy lights, rose petals and candles. If hiring a marquee it should be draped for added elegance and plastic chairs covered with linen stretch covers decorated with bows, swathes of fabric, ribbons or bouquets. Consider decorating tent pegs as well. On the table Centrepieces could include dainty frosted vases with simple flowers, elegant wrought iron candelabras with cascades of flowers, or even a topiary tree in a terracotta pot. The centrepiece should either be fairly low or quite elevated, as the guests need to be able to see one another across the table! Carry your theme through to the crockery, and jazz up table décor with colourful crepe or linen tablecloths in shimmering metallic fabrics. Menus on the tables can be themed to your liking, perhaps presented as decorative fans for an Oriental theme or printed on table napkins. Place cards on the tables also come in many different guises. You could incorporate a place card and menu on a serviette ring, or have guests' nametags on miniature potted plants placed at each setting. Place cards could also be hung over the backs of chairs. The write stuff Guest books are invaluable at a reception in recording personal messages from your guests and preserving treasured memories for years to come. Try one of the following ideas: Collect signatures of the wedding party on a "wedding scroll" hung on an easel - it could later be framed as a keepsake. Leave individual guest books on each table with a pen and disposable camera. Ask guests to write a few words and take photographs of one-another. These could be collected by your bridesmaid and bound into a single guest book. Place beautiful pieces of handmade paper on tables for guests to write on and paste into a guest book later. Gifts to go Wedding favours or mementoes are the gifts that are bought for wedding guests and placed next to the place card on their table at the reception. Often called bonbonieres, traditional wedding favours consist of net posies filled with sugared almonds. Convention dictates that there should be an odd number of almonds, as an odd number cannot be divided and is symbolic of the unbreakable connection between the bridal couple. The sugared almond also represents the duality of life, which contains both bitterness (the almond) and sweetness (the nut's sugared coating), while the egg shape symbolises fertility. While traditional wedding souvenirs are still firm favourites at many celebrations, today's bride has a far greater variety of enticing table gifts from which to choose. Wedding favours should be selected to enhance the overall theme and colour scheme of your wedding, and current trends aim to add that personal touch to your special day - a far cry from the ubiquitous printed matchbook! For a twist on tradition, try wrapping bonbonieres in a coloured net bag, tied with silver wire and matching crystal beads, or in a small glass tied with ribbon. Instead of miniature chocolates in tiny boxes you could opt for Turkish delights or marzipan as an alternative wedding bon-bon. Also consider a fragrant bouquet garni of dried herbs, glasses or teaspoons engraved with the guest's name (these could double as place cards), or even a personalised wedding CD of your favourite music. Another idea is to embroider guests' initials on an Irish linen napkin or to place a buttonhole or mini-bouquet at each place setting. These gifts are usually accompanied by a personal thank-you note, sometimes with a line or verse of poetry significant to the bridal couple. Packaging can be equally inventive, with beautiful boxes, bows, fabrics and floral accessories to match your chosen colours and theme. Think gold organza bags tied with gold ribbon. Time to celebrate! Take your seats Name or number all tables clearly, placing a copy of the seating plan on an attractively decorated board or easel outside the entrance to the venue to assist guests in finding their allocated tables. This can involve listing guests under each table, but could also be alphabetised with the table number of each guest beside his or her surname for easy reference. The traditional bridal table consists of a long table with the bride and groom in the centre, flanked by their respective mothers. The groom's father sits next to the bride's mother and vice versa, with the bridesmaids sitting on the bride's side next to the groom's father, and the groom's best man and attendants on his side, next to the bride's father. Today it is acceptable to have a round table, especially where there are complicated family set-ups. Guests with children should be seated on the outermost tables. Remember to include the musicians and photographer in your plans, seating them close to the action. Take care of children at your reception by enlisting the help of a babysitter who can entertain little ones in a separate room at your chosen venue Meet and greet A formal wedding reception begins with guests being welcomed by a receiving line consisting of the bride, groom and their parents. This is followed traditionally by a full meal served by waiters, an elaborate buffet, or a selection of elegant hors d'oeuvres, accompanied by champagne or sherry. An informal wedding reception does not necessarily follow precedents set down by tradition, and the receiving line is usually replaced by the bridal couple welcoming their guests. Word of mouth A well-planned and heartfelt speech can make all the difference to a wedding reception, articulating the mood and sentiment of the happy event. Traditionally, they will include proposing toasts, thanking individuals or replying to other speeches. And nowadays it isn't just the groom who makes a speech; the bride can also have her say! Often the best man or a close family friend, the master of ceremonies (or toastmaster) has the duty of introducing speakers and helping to lead toasts, generally overseeing the order of events, and should therefore be an assured public speaker. While everybody enjoys an entertaining speech full of humorous anecdotes, try to avoid embarrassing the couple or using clichés and stereotypes. Speeches need not be too traditional and can be adapted to suit circumstances; however, it's a good idea to check that the various themes and subject matters complement one another. The art of speechmaking is no mystery. Following a few simple pointers will help ensure that you're word perfect on the day! Firstly, decide what it is you want to communicate and then write down and learn your speech well ahead of the event, timing its length. Smile and maintain eye contact with the guests. Try to be relaxed and witty - a funny anecdote about the two of you should do the trick. Finally, keep it short and sweet and remember to end it at a high point. Speeches on the day will consist of the following: • To bride and groom: Proposed by the bride's father, an old family friend or a close relative, who welcomes the guests and wishes the bridal couple good fortune, usually including amusing anecdotes about the couple or events in the bride's past. • To bride's parents: The groom responds to the abovementioned toast by thanking the bride's parents, those who have specially contributed to the ceremony and reception, and those who have travelled long distances to attend the wedding. The groom ends his speech with a toast to his new wife. • To bridal couple: Made by the best man who, being often either a brother or a close friend, can supply personal snippets of information about the groom's history and the couple's courtship. The speech should be humorous without causing offence to the couple. Traditionally, the best man also toasts the bridesmaids. • Others: If both sets of parents are present, it is customary to propose a toast to each of them. Prepared by old friends of the family they may be briefly responded to by each father. Any other speeches should be made just before the best man reads the telegrams received from those unable to attend. The essential message of any speech is to wish the bride and groom every happiness for their future. Having your cake Usually taking place after the speeches and toasts, the cake cutting ceremony involves the bride and groom cutting the first slice of cake together. With the bride holding the knife and the groom's hand over hers, they cut the cake then break and eat the first slice together. The rest of the cake is then cut into small portions and served to the bridal party and the guests. Turn up the magic If entertainment is provided in the form of a band or DJ, the bride and groom are expected to lead the first dance. This can be a traditional waltz or another slow song that is a particular favourite. Thereafter the parents take to the floor, followed by the rest of the bridal party, after which guests are free to dance. Make sure the floor is not too slippery, especially if you expect to do some particularly energetic moves! |
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